Frequency and regularity with which I post is just ridiculous, I know ;). I seem to start writing loads of posts and hardly any ever gets finished. Oh, well, at least this one did! :)
I got an email from Prefectdt from SpankedHortic suggesting a meme. Never done any, neither ever wanted but this one is so much more fun that others - at least to me :)
The unbelievable truth
In this meme you will read five "facts" about me. The thing being that four of them are not facts at all but totally untrue lies. What you have to do is identify the genuine fact from the five statements.
Sounds interesting, as I'm a horrible liar. I never mastered that ever so useful ability to do it, so it will be interesting to check how well I'm doing in my effords to master it somehow LOL.
And to make it a bit more interesting to me, for every person guessing correctly (which statement out of 5 is true) I will get 6 strokes of the cane next time a generous top will be around.
1. I was never spanked as a child, though I did received an occsional smack if someone was particularly fed up with my behaviour, never on the bare though.
2. My first ever kinky fantasies were after reading Harry Potter and were taking place in Hogward, magic was used to made ropes restrain culprits in desired positions.
3. Even with all those recent thoughts about domestic discipline, reading up and contemplating I never received a punishment in the form of spanking for some genuine misdeed.
4. My first ever spanking was with belt, from vanilla friends, during my 18th birthday party and the last mark lasted for almost 2 weeks.
5. I hate single-tails, I don't care how precise the person can be, he might now where it will land, but I don't, no single-tail ever touched me and hopefully it's going to stay that way.
Ok. So how does it work? Should I tag someone now to this meme?
I will provide answers next week on Wednesday. Good luck LOL
Wednesday, 11 November 2009
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
Mast obsession...again
Couple of days after I made that post I found an ever so perfect ship.
Well, perhaps not not perfect to actually play, but definitely perfect to fantasies. And there was loads of fantasising :]
You know what the presense of three masts means? You can have three girls there. To play with. To amuse yourself. To abuse them.
You can also make girls watch each other while you torment them. Make them wait and fear their turn.
Will they shiver? Cry? Or just keep observing carefully your every step with widely-open eyes?
Of course you take great care about the girls. You own them and made a lot of plans, and therefore they are safe and well taken care of...
You wouldn't believe it but they made a restuarante out of that ship! What a waste!
Well, perhaps not not perfect to actually play, but definitely perfect to fantasies. And there was loads of fantasising :]
You know what the presense of three masts means? You can have three girls there. To play with. To amuse yourself. To abuse them.
You can also make girls watch each other while you torment them. Make them wait and fear their turn.
Will they shiver? Cry? Or just keep observing carefully your every step with widely-open eyes?
Of course you take great care about the girls. You own them and made a lot of plans, and therefore they are safe and well taken care of...
You wouldn't believe it but they made a restuarante out of that ship! What a waste!
Thursday, 29 October 2009
Discipline
I have been thinking recently a lot about domestic discipline. It's more about discipline really, than domestic. I lack discipline, I always did. Changing it is not easy, especially when there is no external help.
As a spanko girl I learnt that there are ways of finding some external help. So I have been thinking a lot about domestic discipline as it seems to be linked. And reading a lot, especially at Punishment Book. Domestic discipline seems to be as broad area as the CP itself. Or even more.
I'm pretty sure by now that the question is not whether it would work for me, but which aspects of it would work. I'm a control freak, and would never want someone to control my life, but at the same time cravings for some discipline does imply that I would want to have my life control to certain extend. Confusing.
I know that apparently so common aspect of being punished for safety reasons would not work for me. I didn't decide to move out of my parents' house and away from their constant do's and don't's to voluntary allow someone else to decide what is too dangerous for me. It's my life and I will decide what is too dangerous and what's not.
It's a discipline thing I crave for. Studying, working – anything really. To use my time efficiently, to feel more satisfied and fulfilled, to be more happy. I believe it's called time management. Oh, I'm good at planning it's just I can't stick every now and then to what I planned.
I'm suppose it's not as bad as it might sound, I was always a good student etc. I think that my laziness is nicely compensated by my ambition. Still isn't it that we always want more what we have?
How does that all go with domestic discipline? I don't know really, having someone setting up rules for me to follow sounds like it's bound to back fire. Even if it was me setting those rules, being controlled and checked whether I follow them sounds easy only in fantasy.
Reality seems to be full of tricky details that I can't even begun to comprehend...
As a spanko girl I learnt that there are ways of finding some external help. So I have been thinking a lot about domestic discipline as it seems to be linked. And reading a lot, especially at Punishment Book. Domestic discipline seems to be as broad area as the CP itself. Or even more.
I'm pretty sure by now that the question is not whether it would work for me, but which aspects of it would work. I'm a control freak, and would never want someone to control my life, but at the same time cravings for some discipline does imply that I would want to have my life control to certain extend. Confusing.
I know that apparently so common aspect of being punished for safety reasons would not work for me. I didn't decide to move out of my parents' house and away from their constant do's and don't's to voluntary allow someone else to decide what is too dangerous for me. It's my life and I will decide what is too dangerous and what's not.
It's a discipline thing I crave for. Studying, working – anything really. To use my time efficiently, to feel more satisfied and fulfilled, to be more happy. I believe it's called time management. Oh, I'm good at planning it's just I can't stick every now and then to what I planned.
I'm suppose it's not as bad as it might sound, I was always a good student etc. I think that my laziness is nicely compensated by my ambition. Still isn't it that we always want more what we have?
How does that all go with domestic discipline? I don't know really, having someone setting up rules for me to follow sounds like it's bound to back fire. Even if it was me setting those rules, being controlled and checked whether I follow them sounds easy only in fantasy.
Reality seems to be full of tricky details that I can't even begun to comprehend...
Monday, 26 October 2009
Wanna laugh?
More of inspiring key searches...
"bend over the" "her tears" – yes, load of tears on that blog ;)
caned thighs – happens if you meet cruel people, trust me
diaper position hate – I actually like it a lot, make a lot of good to my back ;)
girl getting spanked with nettles video – seriously, nettles make a very bad spanking implement, you should know that by now :P
kammie robertson, kamy robertson – oh guys, 4 letters, 4 bloody letters, it's not THAT difficult to get them right! :P
nettles in panties – oh yeah, WHAT a 'pleasure' you should try it instead of reading other people's experiences :P
kinky sexual activities – sorry, don't know much about those
"hand strapping" punishment – not here, but you can check next door
"i asked him to spank" – yeah, it works sometimes when you ask, but I prefer not to have to ask
"keep them spread" +bdsm – oh you perv! :P
"spank me" "in front of the window" – yeah, well, somehow not my thing LOL
"the specialist" spanking – oh yes! Specialists are always better! ;)
boys spanked nettle – no boys spanked around here, neither with or without nettles. But one day perhaps
ginger figging – It really baffles me how the hell google search for the words I have never used on that blog can bring people here?
i want to be spanked hard and raped even harder – I'm hardy an expert, but I don't think you can compare strength of being spanked with the strength with which you get raped LOL
ideas for nettles play bdsm – have you found what you looked for?
kami robertson anal humiliation – You old, sick perv! Would you might not making my secrets public? LOL
my sore caned bum – we like it that way :)
nasty little girl spanked – sorry, no nasty girls spanked around
on his knees pulling a train – Yyyyy....
possible to flying with your body – Yes, in my kinky word it is very much possible ;)
spank otk raped – sorry, doesn't really work very well in that position LOL
spanking over trousers – Oh, it's just SO wrong. You can't spanked someone over trousers. First you ask them to pull them down, then you spank. You see, proper order is quite crucial in that game! ;)
vanilla spanking – And what is THAT?
"self-spanked" – No, always better to have someone to do it for you, why bottoms should do the whole job? ;)
riding the rail bdsm – hope you enjoyed the post! :) Or even both of them ;)
spanking +tears+kami – good to know not everyone looks for happy endings!
the pain of a slippering – yes, some of us know something about that
spanking therapy – ALWAYS!
hands knees slippering – no, not really, bottom works better...
how to get rid of pain after spanking – excuse me, are you mad?! What a waste!
Caned on thighs – yes, I promise to write one day post about, the problem is that I promise loads of things!
"bend over the" "her tears" – yes, load of tears on that blog ;)
caned thighs – happens if you meet cruel people, trust me
diaper position hate – I actually like it a lot, make a lot of good to my back ;)
girl getting spanked with nettles video – seriously, nettles make a very bad spanking implement, you should know that by now :P
kammie robertson, kamy robertson – oh guys, 4 letters, 4 bloody letters, it's not THAT difficult to get them right! :P
nettles in panties – oh yeah, WHAT a 'pleasure' you should try it instead of reading other people's experiences :P
kinky sexual activities – sorry, don't know much about those
"hand strapping" punishment – not here, but you can check next door
"i asked him to spank" – yeah, it works sometimes when you ask, but I prefer not to have to ask
"keep them spread" +bdsm – oh you perv! :P
"spank me" "in front of the window" – yeah, well, somehow not my thing LOL
"the specialist" spanking – oh yes! Specialists are always better! ;)
boys spanked nettle – no boys spanked around here, neither with or without nettles. But one day perhaps
ginger figging – It really baffles me how the hell google search for the words I have never used on that blog can bring people here?
i want to be spanked hard and raped even harder – I'm hardy an expert, but I don't think you can compare strength of being spanked with the strength with which you get raped LOL
ideas for nettles play bdsm – have you found what you looked for?
kami robertson anal humiliation – You old, sick perv! Would you might not making my secrets public? LOL
my sore caned bum – we like it that way :)
nasty little girl spanked – sorry, no nasty girls spanked around
on his knees pulling a train – Yyyyy....
possible to flying with your body – Yes, in my kinky word it is very much possible ;)
spank otk raped – sorry, doesn't really work very well in that position LOL
spanking over trousers – Oh, it's just SO wrong. You can't spanked someone over trousers. First you ask them to pull them down, then you spank. You see, proper order is quite crucial in that game! ;)
vanilla spanking – And what is THAT?
"self-spanked" – No, always better to have someone to do it for you, why bottoms should do the whole job? ;)
riding the rail bdsm – hope you enjoyed the post! :) Or even both of them ;)
spanking +tears+kami – good to know not everyone looks for happy endings!
the pain of a slippering – yes, some of us know something about that
spanking therapy – ALWAYS!
hands knees slippering – no, not really, bottom works better...
how to get rid of pain after spanking – excuse me, are you mad?! What a waste!
Caned on thighs – yes, I promise to write one day post about, the problem is that I promise loads of things!
Thursday, 22 October 2009
Kinkiness in vanilla life
The more I look at it the more dancing salsa seems to resemble sub/dom (bottom/top or something in between) relationship.
Both are about trust and good chemistry. It will never be enough fun without it.
It helps to know the person you interact with so that the experience can be more intense.
In both cases its the guy making changes and deciding about the course of the activity and the girl adapts. It's him observing and deciding which course of action is better.
Yet, it's a girl adding subtle details. Now matter how wonderful the top/salsero might be if a girl won't show off herself to certain extend (or won't allowed to be showed off) it will never be of any artistic value, the dance or roleplay.
The same way, if the girl's 'reactions' are interesting or worth watching he will be back for more.
I seem to expect similar things from both tops and salseros. I want them to be decided instead of second guessing their every decision. I want them to observe the girl and try to fix certain things as they happen instead of insisting on something that clearly doesn't work, like they don't even care to bother to notice anything around them. (in case you think I expect miracle – I don't, most of the tops I played with exhibits those qualities ;) )
In both situations I look for a stable support, in play for psychological, in dancing for physical one.
I react the same way to tops I'm incompatible with as to salseros which whom I just can't click with. I just don't get emotionally involved and as passively as possible wait for the end of song/scene.
And of course both are far more intense and pleasurable when you know the person and know what to expect to some extend.
There is the issue of submissiveness of course. Funnily enough I get more submissive when dancing salsa than playing. I don't really know why. Maybe because a good salsero will never expect a girl to be truly submissive? It has always been easier for me to be jump into submissive modes when a guy was not expecting me to and subconsciously resisting it when he was trying to force me into it.
There is a common joke you hear when you first start dancing salsa (at least in my home town) that a girl is not supposed to think when dancing. That she should just let go and let the guy 'do the job'. Doesn't it sound 'don't try to top from the bottom'?
Of course good salsero will never want a girl to stop thinking, usually he prefers a girl good and intelligent enough to know when she can show off herself without interfering with the dance. The same way a top wants a girl to react – somehow, whether it's just flinching and heavy breathing or crying her eyes out. Being into the spirit of it shows a guy he is doing the right thing. (Am I right guys?).
Dancing of course does not provide the emotional high the good roleplay can, but can be sometimes equally rewording for me. And the pain in all muscles the next day obviously indulges my masochistic-like needs ;)
Still, I think it's a funny paradox, that you will find me more submissive while dancing instead of being caned LOL
(If someone wants to see some examples of salsa, on the website you will find links to youtube clips with the show by the instructors from the school I started dancing in. (not the first clip!) And sorry for the language ;) )
Both are about trust and good chemistry. It will never be enough fun without it.
It helps to know the person you interact with so that the experience can be more intense.
In both cases its the guy making changes and deciding about the course of the activity and the girl adapts. It's him observing and deciding which course of action is better.
Yet, it's a girl adding subtle details. Now matter how wonderful the top/salsero might be if a girl won't show off herself to certain extend (or won't allowed to be showed off) it will never be of any artistic value, the dance or roleplay.
The same way, if the girl's 'reactions' are interesting or worth watching he will be back for more.
I seem to expect similar things from both tops and salseros. I want them to be decided instead of second guessing their every decision. I want them to observe the girl and try to fix certain things as they happen instead of insisting on something that clearly doesn't work, like they don't even care to bother to notice anything around them. (in case you think I expect miracle – I don't, most of the tops I played with exhibits those qualities ;) )
In both situations I look for a stable support, in play for psychological, in dancing for physical one.
I react the same way to tops I'm incompatible with as to salseros which whom I just can't click with. I just don't get emotionally involved and as passively as possible wait for the end of song/scene.
And of course both are far more intense and pleasurable when you know the person and know what to expect to some extend.
There is the issue of submissiveness of course. Funnily enough I get more submissive when dancing salsa than playing. I don't really know why. Maybe because a good salsero will never expect a girl to be truly submissive? It has always been easier for me to be jump into submissive modes when a guy was not expecting me to and subconsciously resisting it when he was trying to force me into it.
There is a common joke you hear when you first start dancing salsa (at least in my home town) that a girl is not supposed to think when dancing. That she should just let go and let the guy 'do the job'. Doesn't it sound 'don't try to top from the bottom'?
Of course good salsero will never want a girl to stop thinking, usually he prefers a girl good and intelligent enough to know when she can show off herself without interfering with the dance. The same way a top wants a girl to react – somehow, whether it's just flinching and heavy breathing or crying her eyes out. Being into the spirit of it shows a guy he is doing the right thing. (Am I right guys?).
Dancing of course does not provide the emotional high the good roleplay can, but can be sometimes equally rewording for me. And the pain in all muscles the next day obviously indulges my masochistic-like needs ;)
Still, I think it's a funny paradox, that you will find me more submissive while dancing instead of being caned LOL
(If someone wants to see some examples of salsa, on the website you will find links to youtube clips with the show by the instructors from the school I started dancing in. (not the first clip!) And sorry for the language ;) )
Wednesday, 21 October 2009
Watching others play
At the beginning, when I started my kinky explorations I was quite obsessed with playing. I used to had a chance to play on regular but rather infrequent occasions and I wanted to make the best of it.
Coming back home unbruised was just unacceptable. And I used to be very upset and angry if people were saying there are not going to hit me harder/play any more because I look so young and tiny and they don't want to hurt me. Like the fact I was repeatedly saying I was fine meant nothing.
Fortunately I came across people who did trust me when I was saying I'm ok pretty quickly.
And I have been playing rather a lot ever since. I have been trying to count cane strokes I have received, but around year a half ago and more than 2000 strokes I gave up. Although my playing might have been infrequent it certainly WAS intense and full of new experiences.
Part of me feels played out at the moment. I don't crave playing the way I used to, I don't get crazy if no one spanked me for couple of weeks.
I still need that, it still makes me happy, relaxed and alive, but my obsession died out a bit. Or rather changed itself.
I'm finding myself more and more obsessed with watching. I think it started itself when I actually got a chance to observe people playing and realised that it's fascinating.
Ever since a certain warm May afternoon I can feel I'm more and more obsessed with HAVING to watch others.
It's not just spanking and CP. It's everything, consensual or not, kinky or vanilla, sex or not. Everything.
I have been observing HH smacking Graham once and I realised that it's the first time that I have been seeing him smacking someone, like properly observing him with paying attention to it. I could see certain facial expression I have never seen before.
Later there was that weekend, when I find myself in a roleplay that didn't work for me much and I have been observing HH smacking Emma Jane. First there was a bit of jealousy that the roleplay was working for her, but at the same time I realised that I didn't want it to work for me, that watching was enough.
I was guessing what she was feeling, and could compere my thought afterwards hearing to her memories of the scene.
Later there was that situation when I have been holding Haron's hands when Abel was strapping her. After one of the strokes he asked me whether I think she felt that and I said I don't know. I wasn;t being cruel or something, I just didn't have a clue whether she felt it or faked it.
And I would like to know THOSE things.
I really feel obsessive with watching, I'm not sure I'm actually about to do anything about it (would hate violating anyone's privacy) but the truth is, when I fantasies nowadays it's more about watching that actually participating.
I don't know where will that lead me to, but something tells me it might an interesting road. And an interesting variation :)
Coming back home unbruised was just unacceptable. And I used to be very upset and angry if people were saying there are not going to hit me harder/play any more because I look so young and tiny and they don't want to hurt me. Like the fact I was repeatedly saying I was fine meant nothing.
Fortunately I came across people who did trust me when I was saying I'm ok pretty quickly.
And I have been playing rather a lot ever since. I have been trying to count cane strokes I have received, but around year a half ago and more than 2000 strokes I gave up. Although my playing might have been infrequent it certainly WAS intense and full of new experiences.
Part of me feels played out at the moment. I don't crave playing the way I used to, I don't get crazy if no one spanked me for couple of weeks.
I still need that, it still makes me happy, relaxed and alive, but my obsession died out a bit. Or rather changed itself.
I'm finding myself more and more obsessed with watching. I think it started itself when I actually got a chance to observe people playing and realised that it's fascinating.
Ever since a certain warm May afternoon I can feel I'm more and more obsessed with HAVING to watch others.
It's not just spanking and CP. It's everything, consensual or not, kinky or vanilla, sex or not. Everything.
I have been observing HH smacking Graham once and I realised that it's the first time that I have been seeing him smacking someone, like properly observing him with paying attention to it. I could see certain facial expression I have never seen before.
Later there was that weekend, when I find myself in a roleplay that didn't work for me much and I have been observing HH smacking Emma Jane. First there was a bit of jealousy that the roleplay was working for her, but at the same time I realised that I didn't want it to work for me, that watching was enough.
I was guessing what she was feeling, and could compere my thought afterwards hearing to her memories of the scene.
Later there was that situation when I have been holding Haron's hands when Abel was strapping her. After one of the strokes he asked me whether I think she felt that and I said I don't know. I wasn;t being cruel or something, I just didn't have a clue whether she felt it or faked it.
And I would like to know THOSE things.
I really feel obsessive with watching, I'm not sure I'm actually about to do anything about it (would hate violating anyone's privacy) but the truth is, when I fantasies nowadays it's more about watching that actually participating.
I don't know where will that lead me to, but something tells me it might an interesting road. And an interesting variation :)
Sunday, 18 October 2009
Caningversary
I realised today the HORRIBLE thing. On Monday, the 10th Oct, was the second anniversary of my first caning (caningversary?) and I utterly forgot about it! :( Horrible, truly horrible, it was an important day after all, wasn't it? ;)
If I could, I would probably write a long essay on my experience back then. But I can't. I was too overwhelmed with all the emotion I barely remember WHAT I felt! :)
I have been thinking today how could I celebrate it. Well, I know it's a bit too late, but who cares! :) Of course I could leave that matter for HH to decide but I thought I can first ask you. I know, from observing other blogs, readers tend to get quite sadistic...ehem...I meant interesting ideas.
So, any thoughts?
If I could, I would probably write a long essay on my experience back then. But I can't. I was too overwhelmed with all the emotion I barely remember WHAT I felt! :)
I have been thinking today how could I celebrate it. Well, I know it's a bit too late, but who cares! :) Of course I could leave that matter for HH to decide but I thought I can first ask you. I know, from observing other blogs, readers tend to get quite sadistic...ehem...I meant interesting ideas.
So, any thoughts?
Monday, 12 October 2009
Caned
While I have been enjoying the miracles of warm weather and lovely beaches NSI released a clip with me. A rather special one :)
My first ever caning on camera!
Haven't watched it myself yet, as I still have problems with hearing my voice (Perhaps I should hint somewhere that HH should tie me to the bed and force me to watch it LOL), but I have to say that pics look amazing.
Applause to NSI for the play with colours.
This cute little girl looks just like an angel in white clothes. (And red stripes on her bum ;) )
What was that she supposedly has done? Oh, right, set a fire in school. Trust me, she didn't mean to, it WAS an accident ;)
I remember taking the tie off and thinking why was it so important, but I was so distracted I forgot to ask. Now, I know ;)
But coming back to that first-ish caning of mine. I wasn't good at 'it' back then, I had no idea of how much I can take, not to mention WHY I can take it.
Just before we started filming I remember thinking that there is no way I can take it. And then when the caning started I couldn't understand WHY it didn't hurt as much I thought it should. As I haven't seen it yet myself I'm not sure whether it really looks like that, but I remember some very delayed responses.
Stroke – no reaction at first – awareness it should have hurt – awareness I should have reacted – delayed flinch/squirm/ouch.
Hope it's not THAT faked ;) Well, anyway, let me know if you have seen it, me as it might be couple of weeks before will be 'tricked' to watch it ;)
I don't remember whether I have ever posted anything about distraction during shooting that 'increases' my pain tolerance. I know some other spanking models experienced that phenomena too. It's really amazing how insignificant pain might become, how much a person can get lost in the experience, even if she is doing it for the first time.
When Paul and Lucy decided it to call it a day I felt I could do it all over again and more. And I knew I could. Who cares I almost have fallen asleep from exhaustion couple of hours later in a restaurant LOL It all felt so nice :)
(All photos (c) Northern Spanking)
My first ever caning on camera!
Haven't watched it myself yet, as I still have problems with hearing my voice (Perhaps I should hint somewhere that HH should tie me to the bed and force me to watch it LOL), but I have to say that pics look amazing.
Applause to NSI for the play with colours.
This cute little girl looks just like an angel in white clothes. (And red stripes on her bum ;) )
What was that she supposedly has done? Oh, right, set a fire in school. Trust me, she didn't mean to, it WAS an accident ;)
I remember taking the tie off and thinking why was it so important, but I was so distracted I forgot to ask. Now, I know ;)
But coming back to that first-ish caning of mine. I wasn't good at 'it' back then, I had no idea of how much I can take, not to mention WHY I can take it.
Just before we started filming I remember thinking that there is no way I can take it. And then when the caning started I couldn't understand WHY it didn't hurt as much I thought it should. As I haven't seen it yet myself I'm not sure whether it really looks like that, but I remember some very delayed responses.
Stroke – no reaction at first – awareness it should have hurt – awareness I should have reacted – delayed flinch/squirm/ouch.
Hope it's not THAT faked ;) Well, anyway, let me know if you have seen it, me as it might be couple of weeks before will be 'tricked' to watch it ;)
I don't remember whether I have ever posted anything about distraction during shooting that 'increases' my pain tolerance. I know some other spanking models experienced that phenomena too. It's really amazing how insignificant pain might become, how much a person can get lost in the experience, even if she is doing it for the first time.
When Paul and Lucy decided it to call it a day I felt I could do it all over again and more. And I knew I could. Who cares I almost have fallen asleep from exhaustion couple of hours later in a restaurant LOL It all felt so nice :)
(All photos (c) Northern Spanking)
Saturday, 10 October 2009
Sexy postcard
It's nice to bring a kinky souvenir from holidays. Unfortunately, I do not have the luck of others to run into loads of them. Apart from postcards that is ;)
That's what I bought last year.
Proudly decorates my wall ;)
This year I found something more provocative (while looking for some lovely seesides of course ;) )
(excuse quality of those pics, my camera prefers day light ;) )
Straight after I saw it I thought I need to send it to HH. But why would I send him a postcard with 365 positions to have sex? Unfortunately they didn't sell any '365 positions to smack a girl' LOL Not that I asked ;)
Eventually I decided to send two postcards, one to HH and one to Abel (I even thoguht to send them inside the envelope!). Blushing like hell I paid for them only to realise I forgot one for myself, so I had to undergo that shamefull procedure again LOL
Anyway, I still think I want a kinky version. I can think myself of 25 spanking position (to smack a girl with a hand). Hardly a new one for each day, but you still have two per month + one for special occations...Now...anyone out there able to draw? ;)
That's what I bought last year.
Proudly decorates my wall ;)
This year I found something more provocative (while looking for some lovely seesides of course ;) )
(excuse quality of those pics, my camera prefers day light ;) )
Straight after I saw it I thought I need to send it to HH. But why would I send him a postcard with 365 positions to have sex? Unfortunately they didn't sell any '365 positions to smack a girl' LOL Not that I asked ;)
Eventually I decided to send two postcards, one to HH and one to Abel (I even thoguht to send them inside the envelope!). Blushing like hell I paid for them only to realise I forgot one for myself, so I had to undergo that shamefull procedure again LOL
Anyway, I still think I want a kinky version. I can think myself of 25 spanking position (to smack a girl with a hand). Hardly a new one for each day, but you still have two per month + one for special occations...Now...anyone out there able to draw? ;)
Wednesday, 7 October 2009
Kinky enough :)
As it become obvious last week I'm still kinky, or at least kinky 'enough' :) We did some interesting scenes and over the time I could feel how my confidence about being kinky was coming back.
During the first spanking all I could think was 'why the hell it hurt so much?' and did my best to 'control' the pain but it doesn't work that way. So I failed, and the hairbrush defeated me, first time I think. I felt like such a wimp when HH said 10 more, I wriggled out after 4 and the last six were way lighter. Soooo wimpy. When he said 'good girl' at the end I felt even worse. I most certainly was not good. So afterward I kept teasing and bratting to earn some more. You know, just to punish myself for my weakness I think, but HH didn't pick up the hint. (Note to myself: ask Emma Jane for some tutoring how to brat effectively)
Later on though we played some more, and it was getting easier and easier. I remember some lovely caning. Thin, whippy cane that should have stung a lot barely made me flinch. I knew it hurt, but somehow I was not aware of it at a time.
I love that feeling when pain comes to you with delay, when you know it should hurt yet it doesn't. When you muscles contract expecting the impact followed by pain but nothing happens. There is that crazy battle in you mind: 'Oh shit, it's going to hurt', 'Oh, it didn't', 'Or maybe did?' 'Didn't?', 'Did?' And before your mind can agree on one answer it's over.
Just before bedtime I was in a mood for some school roleplay. I wanted to be a little, poor girl. And the teacher to be sympathetic. Such was my mind set.
But character that HH decided to play was not sympathetic at all. He was angry which made me very defiant and rebellious, and the whole poor little girl was gone replaced by a cheeky, angry and proud one.
And I have to say, there is something very fulfilling and satisfying in bending over in school uniform and being brave. When you make sure you will not scream or cry. When you use all your strength to stay in position. When you control your voice to count steadily but fail miserably. Voice will always betray you letting him know that it hurts. But it makes it even better. You let the whole world know that it hurts yet you stay in position. It's just so bloody satisfying.
When the last stroke of slipper slammed across my cheeks and I stammered the number huge grin appeared on my face.
I survived (and was back kinky :) )
And not even a single bruise on my bum - bugger!
During the first spanking all I could think was 'why the hell it hurt so much?' and did my best to 'control' the pain but it doesn't work that way. So I failed, and the hairbrush defeated me, first time I think. I felt like such a wimp when HH said 10 more, I wriggled out after 4 and the last six were way lighter. Soooo wimpy. When he said 'good girl' at the end I felt even worse. I most certainly was not good. So afterward I kept teasing and bratting to earn some more. You know, just to punish myself for my weakness I think, but HH didn't pick up the hint. (Note to myself: ask Emma Jane for some tutoring how to brat effectively)
Later on though we played some more, and it was getting easier and easier. I remember some lovely caning. Thin, whippy cane that should have stung a lot barely made me flinch. I knew it hurt, but somehow I was not aware of it at a time.
I love that feeling when pain comes to you with delay, when you know it should hurt yet it doesn't. When you muscles contract expecting the impact followed by pain but nothing happens. There is that crazy battle in you mind: 'Oh shit, it's going to hurt', 'Oh, it didn't', 'Or maybe did?' 'Didn't?', 'Did?' And before your mind can agree on one answer it's over.
Just before bedtime I was in a mood for some school roleplay. I wanted to be a little, poor girl. And the teacher to be sympathetic. Such was my mind set.
But character that HH decided to play was not sympathetic at all. He was angry which made me very defiant and rebellious, and the whole poor little girl was gone replaced by a cheeky, angry and proud one.
And I have to say, there is something very fulfilling and satisfying in bending over in school uniform and being brave. When you make sure you will not scream or cry. When you use all your strength to stay in position. When you control your voice to count steadily but fail miserably. Voice will always betray you letting him know that it hurts. But it makes it even better. You let the whole world know that it hurts yet you stay in position. It's just so bloody satisfying.
When the last stroke of slipper slammed across my cheeks and I stammered the number huge grin appeared on my face.
I survived (and was back kinky :) )
And not even a single bruise on my bum - bugger!
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